July 25, 2013

10 Things the Future Still Owes Me

I remember the summer of 2000, my Youth Pastor asking the group what they thought the 21st Century would look like. Things like “flying cars” and “robot maids” were thrown around. Really it was just a lead-in to telling us the summer camp theme was going to be sci-fi themed (but not too sci-fi themed, so the really cool kids wouldn’t be turned off, or something). The point was, 2000 AD looked an awful lot like 1999 AD, and that was a tad disappointing. In fact, I’m still disappointed. Here are some things I’m still waiting to see come rolling down the treadmill:


10. A “fold” buttonI literally thought this afternoon, “I need to set the dryer to “fold” before I leave so it will be done before I get home.” Maybe I only thought half that sentence before I realized my error.

9. The death of the fax machineSeriously, whatever law has to be passed to permanently make every industry able to scan and email rather than require faxing, needs to happen.

8. Dismantling the TSAThis really doesn’t have anything to do with the future, but I think it’s worth tossing into any discussion about improving the world.


7. Machine-wash EVERYTHINGThe fact that anything in the 21st Century still needs to be handwashed or dry-cleaned only, I find to be a total failure of modern technology.

6. TeleportationNo more bad drivers. Potentially still traffic jams, but no more bad drivers! And no more driving! I really don’t enjoy driving. I suppose you could still take road trips recreationally, like the way people still insist on sleeping in tents when we have perfectly good lake houses and resorts.

5. Robbie the RobotBecause, why not actually have a robot maid?

4. Home grocery deliveryEvery time I watch an old movie where there’s a knock on the side door and some delivery boy is standing there with a box of produce, I’m envious. Maybe in some areas this kind of thing is still available, but no where I’ve lived.


3. Wifi everywhereEvery place of business should have available wifi. As much as everyone likes to tag when they arrive somewhere or eat something or buy something, you’d think more businesses would see this as cheap advertising, to make the posting process faster and easier for their customers.

2. A magic pillApply as needed

1. Personal Closet Shopper Every time I go to Epcot, the Future promises me an automated closet that fills itself and selects outfits on every morning based on my color and style preferences in accordance with the weather. I can’t imagine a price too high for such a device.

What are you still waiting on The Future to make good on?


  1. Best. Post. Ever. I'm totally on board with transportation. Heck, I'd even take flying cars at this point! The more I watch Star Trek, the more I'd kill for a replicator. No cooking, unless you just really want to. Totally agree with getting rid of the fax machine, TSA, and needing a "fold" button. But I also want someone to put my laundry away for me. Maybe Robbie could do that. ;-) LOL

  2. Before I moved out of Vegas, I used the grocery delivery service from a local store. I LOVED it haha.

  3. Time travel, hover boards, jet packs, and instant food.

  4. Definitely teleportation!

  5. Every time I have to fax something, I start yelling. I'm not even kidding. It's even worse when I ask the place if I can scan/e-mail a document and they use a condescending tone to tell me no. Hello! You are the one using dated technology!!!

  6. I'm still holding out for the hoverboard. If you ever want to talk about number 8 let me know...

  7. Yes, to all of these. I certainly think having to dry clean clothes is a conspiracy to raise the cost of high-end clothing and keep those companies in business.

  8. Amen to getting rid of fax machine already!

    As for other things that need to be here already, I would really appreciate computers that reliably respond to voice commands. I could get an insane amount of work done if computers could actually and functionally take dictation, write memos and perform basic internet searches/downloads on verbal command only. Imagine being able to clean your house and keep up with your work email at the same time! Or work out while dictating a business letter that could be properly formatted, spell checked and ready for your signature when you stepped off the treadmill!


I was nice and didn't turn on word verifications. Please reciprocate by having your reply-to email set and not posting anonymously.